junkmail oracle

winter
i s s u e

2002

poems

 

joshua klocek
joshua klocek is a 21-year-old poet from naperville, ill. he enjoys abstract painting when he's not delivering the chicago tribune to suburban yuppies.

Works on this page:
united nations supply co.
is it up to me?
firework

 

United Nations Supply co.

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Is it up to me?

1.
The light reflecting off her eyes began to fade, slowly,
    sun setting over an open plain
Soft shallow of her neck the nighttime to come
In weaning twilight, clouds rolling, plane beneath
Sound lags behind, then silent
"Share with me, share yourself with me"
Chest rising as she inhales
One more breath
Rising again
"Can't you?"
He stands, part of the sky
"Leave it be"
Turns her head, now facing
"Can't you?"
Wish me away, far from here
"You know I can"
"Then won't you?"
"You know I will, you know I want to"
Stop meeting gaze
"Do I?"
Do I ask this question of chaos?
If a halo shone and brought forth to the dividing line,
    itself impure
Could you cite places suitable to explain?
And admit the rawness, the wrongdoings
Responsibility of your action in part
"Come on"-
No
Excuses instead
"It's not either or"
"That's not it at all"
Selflessness will backfire
Kick cement
He flees to the isolated choirs that she will follow
Inside to his voice locked up, strings released, resonate
    hallway, down stairs, to door, then her
The music
Choose
What do you want?
Which will it be?

2.
Daylight into streetlights
Crowing moon
Heavy tides cling to her hair, languid and limp, framing her
    portrait
She strums a guitar absently
His reason
Seen her starve just a little for so long
I've watched her cry everyday through my hands
Your deepest pain
Blood of wine
Sit
Spilt into chair
Elbows propped up
Inviting
Memory like him, consciousness was easy
Leaning doorway
A hope
Punishment for sound
Father hearing
Look, face out of focus, can't see clear
You weave in screaming that the day has left you
    righteous
And that I to you know nothing about the truth however
    perceive it
If you decide why I have found my rest then take solace
    your imagination, a lingering reminder
Once in that time, stubble accumulating quick under your
    chin, a blade of grass grew no blight upon our
   peace
Without her notice he slumps laconic against the wall
Constellation across his image, outline catching table
Beaten luminescence
Mutter
Smell of rain
Take sadness deep heart
Shatter not for trying
Heaven not set in ways

3.
Outside dim-like
Hung bloated chain pivot in gravity to a sad two-horned
    existence
All alike
How many failures and mistakes have been forgotten?
How many exceptions?
Appearing finite for huddled poor fearing life in disorder,
    mind conjure a play
The scene set before
Try mending her without that power of speaking
"Hey, I - um - "
Don't move, even flinch interrupted
"I thought, I mean you - you want me to -"
Trail off
Paralyzed
Neck down
"I'm not sure, ah - that I can explain - or make you
    - "
Caution at pupils enlarged, outer edge a society destroyed
Watch yourself
Possible to distract
Will upon my precariousness
Not open this valve
Dig at me with destiny, rack among the pain of being born
Just want common gods
Is there a vessel when they are appeased?
As I am aware, those also aware, who deal in resulting
    dimensions, placate only acceptable response
She has to know about the secrets there
Whether real or not
I Suppose that I were to stand here, teetering towards
    martyrdom
Set in stone
Clipped wings seek no interest from flying
At least shambles return to their owner eventually
They don't blame, they don't apologize
They don't treat your habit as a living lesson
"You're right to deserve better, I wish I could give - "
Such confession coming from him ignite past outbursts
    omissions
Collapse here next to me, forgiven for being old
Ageless unbecoming
" - what you want"
I can't mean it
Can't mean anything
Looking right at you
Late comfort

4.
That I can be alive and blessed in pink morning
Reprieve the question for
Don't waste their salvation nor want
Harried in comfort
It is said
But no sliver of doubt changes your prophecy in the
    of man
No education that gains more than your cry, a shot
    the dark
Sunday he's drawn awake
Too many times
Long night
Turning over, over again in our sleep, over this divide
A pent-up soul yearning for touch
The rattling of drums
Sleep while you can, the dreaming era has past
Take a lover and circle round the consequence
Remain afloat
Do I travel through closed doors to find you?
Must they do the same?
Believe that the step does continue along slips and craters
    litter your previous surroundings
Noticed crumpled shirt cast from covering
So small
Known that life is long and all of them are in trouble too
    most everything adds up to very little and I'm
    empty and the earth moves beneath our feet
Regardless

5.
He spites her now and then
Vindictiveness yet to leave
Standard-bearer like timepiece malfunctioning, why
moments change into moments
Symbols cheat dialect
Not good enough?
Then help me
Months spent mouth shut
You moan in slumber
Clear forehead
So be it
Droplets innumerable
Sprinkles chest
Argument pointlessly spread thin
Just meant repair
Sorry complex
Need not salute or bow, assured
Solution draft
Exit so distraught a vacuum, the myriad substance of
benefit and decay, the brush, the chalice without
work
Sometimes compromise
Credible reporting, spun tales of happenstance
Inverse also an interpretation
Depends

6.
This circumstance, bundle of nerves, magnified in well
    objects, thunders for no one's sake
Stories untold past
A midnight, tomorrow's rouse
Innocence
Thumb at bottom lip, her faint grin
Soon she'll yawn and rub her calves together
Arching in a stretch
Her countenance replays the tension unavoidable as
    epidemic
Ask her what she's thinking
She might tell you
"Last Fourth of July-can't remember anyone else now,
    seems like - its like we were the only ones
    there"
Pause
"We were, weren't we?"
 

Firework

1.
Quiet dark flower
Open, walking hand and hand, colored air
He tilts her head, sighing
Falling back, vision closed, the sky ablaze, her face a
    prism
Slow
What other beauty is there but when her ashen thoughts
    for me?
Lit up, golden
She knows no surface
I see the universe in her touch
I feel the wind through your hair
Again
You lie undisturbed
Always
Keep it with you
This night when they danced together for the first time, her
    close against him, arms over his shoulders,
    his back, arms around her waist, around her
    back
Breath soft and warm, barely moving from her lungs
You remember a smile as you caught me looking but
    didn't say anything
And I cupped your belly, staying silent
    remember shining
Your eyes that glitter fireworks
Your thousand faces
Passing

2.
Underneath, washed out
A broken bridge and two liars leveled in wood
The lamplight folded, illuminating a body sewn from the
    of summer leaves
With grace
They begin
Lost in a whisper
You sink towards the sea and the forgiving soil
Down
These lovers unscathed
A handful of roses, the slant of your thigh
Fragile conversations about longing lost in another
    lifetime
Still smiling
A laugh in his arm
The deepest blue I'll ever see comes drifting to her
    fingertips
Beckoning beyond all of us
Twisted
Curling forever towards a sunshine
Her mouth, top upturned so slightly, searching
Come aligned and rest on mine
Eyelids flicker, cease motion
Nothing dark as you live
Tightening grip a weeping star

3.
Through lost path, bright diamond, a forgotten doe of being
    as mercy, tender lines trace back to flashes
    waking
Stolen sign points the way
Step down, this valley
Extinguish your auburn skin of its questions
Lonely sky, sweep the crowds amassed
Take your heroes, we don't want them
Enter
Purge all water
Wailing wonder, an expression of lament painted wisps
Faint season ebb alongside
Watch me
I'll make the world disappear
Like that its gone

4.
Wave goodbye pinprick iris
Crown atop his head
Talk
Short and necessary
To them grapple silver long glance
No record of such feat
She parting sideways
Naked self held close
Dimmed steady to rhythm forest beating
Smooth rock
Hair caught, tangled to the river empties
Lose this, not call him by name
Ticklish body makes for ticklish heart
Predisposition loops inward on itself
Erases the salt gathered in the wells
Good to trap energy
Equaled release
Must a village censor spotted urges, whose worth for them
    decide?
Safely an answer in this bed while we are opaque
The summit recessed, fill with ink
Use it in fortune
No other drawn dust
Like art captures a lithograph, impression
I stammer, nervous to divide a situation of your
    compliance
You widen, shrink, and the onlooker pieces it together
Wondering aloud about boards strewn across in reaching
    evening
Remnants, each nailed, made spoiled
Whatever exists in black airy combustion registers the
    of film conjoining our separate ideals
Persevere, heights unreached, now, vague gamble
Low tunnel, seduction forth from denial, no concubine
Your construct of cascades does happen
I repeat
May this last

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